Another Pagan Blog
Wow guys,
I feel really bad about how long it's taken me to write an update. But in all honesty I've been struggling a bit with depression lately. As a desert rat you'd think I'd have an easier time with summer, but it's never a good period for me. For one thing, unless I have a job I'm pretty much stuck with nothing to do for three months. And I haven't had a job. I keep struggling and looking for one, but it's just not a good period right now. And the longer I go without a job, the shittier I feel about myself. Plus, summer is hot, and heat makes me lethargic, and lethargy makes me lazy. And there's another point where I feel shitty about myself, when I end up lazing around the house all day.

But the last couple of days have really picked up.
For over eight months now, my Patron god Lugh has been hanging over my shoulder, minding me that his holiday, Lughnasadh, the very reason he came into my life to start with, is ever approaching. So when it came time to discuss our preparations for the holiday I stood up and took control. It was what I had been feeling from Lugh for a long time. I had been doing the research on the holiday for months, and when it came right down to it, I knew what I wanted to do.

So I did it. This last Saturday, July 30th, my group held a Lughnasadh ritual, led by myself. My part in it was calling the god, raising the cone of power, and leading the magical workings.
It was incredible. I was very nervous leading up to it, but the moment we called the god and goddess, it got better. It wasn't perfect, but it was still amazing.
Raising the cone of power was pretty incredible too. In the past when that exercise was done in our group, it had been a sort of swirling of power between person to person. I suppose I should have incorporated that a bit, but what I did instead was lead people to meditate on a stump that was on the grounds, and imagine the seed of that stump growing down and up, comparing the stump to Yggdrasil, the tree of life. I've now written that mediation down into my book of shadows, I really want to perfect it for future use.

The magical workings started with me telling the tale of Lughnasadh, how it came about and why it is so important. It really did feel as though Lugh was there then, taking pride in what I said, and laughing at me a bit too. As it turns out, Lugh seems like a rather down-to-earth god. Or maybe it's just that way with me.

Then we played a hot-potato/word association game, another thing I'm going to have to perfect. It's hard to play games without losers.

And finally we all took a beanbag, imbued it with the energy of something we hoped to come true in the coming future, and tossed it into a 'cauldron.'

All in all, it was very interesting and it has left me feeling invigorated, and better than before.

My future is still a big blurry question mark, but as long as I keep applying myself, the gods will provide. They always have in the past. Of course, a little extra magic never hurt anyone either.

I'm really going to try to start this site back up folks. Please forgive me for my absence. And I hope you all have a blessed Lughnasadh week.

Blessings on you all,
Your ex-born again, bi-sexual pagan,


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